Pumpkin Blogging 2008

Greasemonkey

I was working when saw this wheelbarrow sitting on the curb in front of some guys house. I stopped and asked him why he was throwing it out and he said, "The tire is flat." I told him that sucked since the flat tire can't be fixed and did he mind if I took it. He said "Nope" so I tossed it on my truck.

How To Inflate A Tubeless Wheelbarrow Tire:

1. Get some Petroleum Jelly and grease the sonavabitch up. Really. Don't be shy with it.

2. Push one side of the tire where it's supposed be, and really grease up the other side to make a seal.

3. Get out your bike pump and pump like crazy. For real, you gotta build up some serious psi.

4. Turn it over and get to wheelbarrowin'.

Oh yeah, and don't forget to yell "Sucker!" at the guy who tossed out a perfectly good wheelbarrow the next time you drive by his house.

All The Same To Me

Wall Street meltdowns are making you nervous. Pre-Election Day politics are getting you angry. The 24 hour news-cycle is making you crazy.

My advice? You need to get out more...

Teenagers From Mars

You bastards are wrong for not giving it up for Bill Lynch.

You old hippies can have your George, Paul, Ringo, and that other dead guy. Me? I've got Jerry, Glenn, Doyle, and Eerie Von. Their music means as much to me as the music your generation says changed your lives and the world we all live in. So fuck off with your "All You Need Is Love" and "She Loves You" cause I've got "Some Kinda Hate" and "Devils Whorehouse."

Me and The Misfits go way back. I can remember sitting around with my skate-rat friends drinking snuck from the old mans cooler beers and listening to "Legacy Of Brutality" trying to figure out what the hell Glenn was singing at us. I can remember a bunch of us building my cousins half-pipe in a day and then skating it at 3AM, cranking up "Earth AD." I remember the first punk rock mixtape anybody ever gave me, and it had (among other songs) "Death Comes Ripping", "Wolfs Blood", and "We Bite." Hell, I'll even own up to being a teenager in my tiny bedroom sweating and stripped to the waist wailing along to "Come Back" and wishing I had a girl I could sing it to. Like I said, me and The Misfits go way back.

So I've said it before, but Bill Lynch is my hero. Saying that, I also gotta say......Bill, if you ever get Jerry again, or Doyle, or Eerie Von, or Glenn, would it kill you to give me a heads up? Seriously, an e-mail, a phone call, or something? Jeez....